blunami

The breaks! The breaks! Someone hit the FRIGGIN BREAKS ALREADY!!!!!!!!!!!! OHOHOHMYACHINGHEAD.
What a year 2006 has already turned into.
If it keeps up, i'm cancelling life and hybernating. And THAT is the final word.
Work is nothing short of effin HORRENDOUS! (BTW thanks to my lovely wife who turned me on to a more ... appropriate form of using expletives.) I have been threatening for a while to leave. I've sorta looked here and there. I had a feeling that the little rats nest was going to explode and SHIT has HIT the fan! WHOA. Only... I got my hands, face and some of myclothing a little dirty and that ticks me off.
We have theives and liars and lazy bastards and two faced bitchy women all floating around grinning like sharks, pressing bad glossy lipstick to their snears just before leaving the door and someone has slipped another item into their bag that does not belong to them. The biggest problem is that being in "middle management" means that I had to get the brunt of some of this sticky finger stuff. No, no one said I stole. No I wasn't blamed for the seriously HUGE amount of items and cash removed from the premesis in a matter of months. BUT I am "the leader of this team and someone does have to pay and someone does have to be an exampl and it's going to be you". GGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR I snear and spit and stomp off and as soon as no one is looking kick up my heals and go to Seattle for three days. THEN I come home and spend two days in a silent meditation and then go back to work and pretend that I'm butt hurt. Well, I am PISSED that I am in a position that required me to take the brunt of the fall. THEN.... well, then I was absolved and with a feeling of utter puffed out chest, tongue in cheek, wiggle my tail as I run out the door glee I am feeling vindicated. Sort of. Ok, that was what the last two weeks were like. Tonight as I blast through this check in post I'm reviewing a resume that makes me seem like an amazing effin intelligent multi talented super rocker and feeling a little twinge of fear because I'm going to send this thing out into the world with an amount of seriousness that I have never displayed before. And Im selling goods that I have doubted in the past (self) and need to get over that fast! (FASTER) because the phone will ring and someone will say "wow come see me" and then I'll have to do that. *clears throat and readies self"* PHEW. Ok so that's the work stuff. I think that one of my favorite friendships has been wrecked to a degree because of work stuff. I'm as certain though that it will be mended, we are both good at mending things. IN the meantime I"m off to do something different with myself. And school starts again soon!
Love is not worth trying to language.
Relationships out side of work are being tended to as best as I can. I'm missing my buddies, trying to get to a few more events, coffies, movies, and mass and fit in the sleep/eat/work/study/excersize thing.
The body.
OOOHHHH this little body is getting a workout lately. A thrashing to be exact. NOT the kind this kinky dyke is used to but it feels good all the same. I'm hitting the gym nightly, started biking again and reinstated my favorite ways of meditating. I'm feeling a little tired, a little rattled and yet energized and excited at the same time.
The mind.
BORING place to be right now.

Sorry to hear Pickle is sick. Give her a huge for me puleeze!

*waves and sends those bloody good kisses*
Gotta run to a meeting now, I"m back to three AA meetings a week again, last week I celebrated 14yrs of continuous sobriety. The Gods are good. Really REALLY good.